Navigating Past, Truth and Paradoxes towards Freedom

There's a pivotal moment in our lives, typically around the age of seven, marking the transition from the first seven years to the second seven-year cycle. From an external perspective, it might seem like a singular event or a series of events, or even an overarching context. However, internally, there exists a particular event, a single point, where a decision is made—a decision that significantly influences and shapes our lives.

The essence of our work lies in becoming aware of this decision. It has not only shaped our past but continues to influence our present circumstances. Whether this decision led us to success, fame, wealth, and achievement, or to struggles like misery and depression, it doesn't grant us true freedom. True freedom lies in acknowledging this decision's impact on our lives and understanding that it is only one part of the broader spectrum of choices we can make.

Every choice we make entails both embracing something and renouncing something else. Our freedom lies in recognizing this and using our past decisions as tools rather than allowing them to restrict us. We must acknowledge their importance while also being prepared to release them when they hinder our growth or limit our freedom.

This decision, while bringing about many blessings, also imposes limitations and challenges. Life, after all, is filled with paradoxes. For instance, we might excel in our careers but struggle in our relationships, or vice versa. The key is to rise above these limitations, to see them for what they are, and to take ownership not only of the decisions that have shaped us but also of the aspects we may have neglected or rejected along the way.

At certain junctures in our lives, we may find ourselves relinquishing our dreams, often in pursuit of safety and security. Circumstances or sudden events may force us into choices that deviate from our true desires, leading us to adopt strategies or trajectories aimed at survival. Ironically, these very strategies, while offering us a sense of security, can also become our prisons.

As time goes on, we may begin to bump against the walls of these self-imposed limitations, struggling to understand why they exist. Often, the decisions that created them are buried deep within our subconscious, making them challenging to unravel. Yet, through introspection and self-work, we can bring these decisions into the light, acknowledging the parts of ourselves we have alienated in the process.

For instance, I once fled from my family to escape a suffocating environment. While this decision granted me a life filled with travel, discovery, and adventure, it also meant sacrificing the sense of belonging and connection that comes from family and community. Becoming aware of this decision allowed me to recognize the price I paid for the life I chose and the limitations it imposed upon me.

With this awareness comes the opportunity to reintegrate the parts of ourselves we have neglected or rejected, allowing us to lead fuller, more harmonious lives. By embracing all facets of our being, we move beyond the constraints of black-and-white thinking, finding wholeness and creativity in the synthesis of our experiences.

Hence my self -inquiry questions:

What decision have I made as a child that are still directing my life today?

What dreams have I left behind that are now part of my “unlived life*”?

Can I see the perfection of these choices?

Can I see how necessary they were for my learning and growth?

Can I see how they have become limitations?

Can I take responsibility for these choices?

Can I take responsibility for the choice I am making now?



With Infinite Love


* Living Your Unlived Life: Coping with Unrealized Dreams and Fulfilling Your Purpose in the Second Half of Life by Robert A. Johnson